Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Angels

On a serious note, I have to speak about angels. I'm usually a private person but I must tell you the feelings of my heart! It's been stored up for a while so it may get lengthy. I promise to lighten up next time!

This past year is one I never want to repeat! I have struggled with many troubles.

With the housing market as it is Geoff struggles to find work everyday. By January we may be completely out of the appraisal business. Our other real estate investments have completely gone sour. Most of my family is in the real estate business and many of us are struggling right now. We, like many of you, find ourselves wondering where we will be tomorrow. My two best friends are wondering how long they will be able to keep their homes. Just the financial issues is enough to drag anybody down!
For a while now I have struggled with fertility issues and had my last miscarriage this past summer. The decision to make it my last has been torture.
I'm struggling with some behavior issues from a couple of my kids and some extremely sad decisions of another family member.
We came home from working on the cabin a couple of weekends ago to find the downstairs dining room flooded and part of the ceiling falling in from a broken water line on the toilet.
The list goes on.......and on.......and on.....

One night this past summer I was thinking about all these issues I was trying to deal with all at once (isn't that how it always is!-- can't have one at a time!) I began to feel like big boulders had knocked me flat on my chest. It felt as though more and more boulders kept falling on me making sure I wasn't able to get up. I started thinking about the scriptures and how it is that angels appear to so many people. I thought of Nephi, Laman and Lemuel. If an angel could appear to Laman and Lemuel who were so disobedient why, then, couldn't the Lord send me an angel. Afterall, I'm a good person trying to make good choices. I don't think I'm quite as disobedient as Laman and Lemuel so I asked God to send me an angel.
The night of my last miscarriage my mom came up to my room to see how I was doing. She cried with me and offered me words of comfort. I told her my wish for an angel. She continued to help comfort me.

Life went on. Slowly, slowly I am more able to pull one boulder off at a time. I was really looking forward to General Conference hoping for some words of comfort and support.
That's exactly what I got! I was so moved and impressed with Elder Holland's talk on Saturday afternoon. Please, if you haven't, go listen to the talk. The written talk will be available tomorrow. Here are some of his words: (God speaking right to me!)

"From the beginning down through the dispensations God has used angels as his emissaries in conveying love and concern for his children".

"Angels are still sent to help us".

"When we speak of those who are instruments in the hands of God we're reminded that not all angels are from the other side of the veil. Some of them we walk with and talk with here, now, everyday. Some of them live in our neighborhoods, some of them gave birth to us......."

"God never leaves us alone".

Let me tell you about my angels!

That night of my miscarriage, God sent me angels! There was my mom standing over me, crying with me, hugging me and helping me feel better, offering me merciful attention. As I went downstairs there was my dad. He gave me a big hug and told me he loved me. Then I had a visit from sister Martin ( I work with her in my calling) with a gift of love and a hug.

The next few days as I still cried I would walk into the room where Geoff was and he let me lay in his lap and cry some more. There was my angel husband trying his best to help me.

I can't tell you how many times Geoff and I have gone to my parents house asking for help and counsel on behalf of our kids and another family member who has made such sad choices. They have been angels! I know they pray for us and feel our pain also. They have given us inspired direction and counsel and continue to listen to our worries and offer comfort and support. My dad called Geoff the other day as Geoff was faced with a difficult task. My dad offered Geoff words of counsel and support and helped Geoff feel confident in what needed to be done. I have an angel dad!
Last week my mom took my kids for the week so I could go to the mountains with Geoff. We needed that break together so badly and oh how we appreciated their help! I have angel parents!

I have angel friends who come to kidnap me and take me to sonic and let me talk out some of my feelings. I love the trips to the store and I appreciate so much their patience when I don't want to talk about "it". My sweet friend let me come over at 10pm to cry on her shoulder and let me listen to her troubles so I could forget about mine for a bit. I have angel friends!

Bishop's wife is another of my angels! Sister Kempton teaches in Relief Society. One Sunday she brought a picture of Christ hugging a man. Tyler, my son, walked up to the picture after Relief Society and was quite moved by it. He just stood there and stared for about 5 minutes! The next day sister Kempton brought Tyler the same picture for him to keep. She'll never know how much that touched him!

Just yesterday my mom, again, took my kids so I could go with Geoff to Tucson to make a visit with a friend and do some business things. She took care of my kids all day long. Then when it looked as though I would be home really late she brought my kids to my house, got them in bed and cleaned my kitchen! Again, an angel sent to help me!

That same day, yesterday, my angel sister sent me a bouquet of flowers to brighten my day! Just completely out of the blue! She'll never know how much I appreciate her thoughtfulness and love!

I AM SURROUNDED BY ANGELS! I thank you all for your love, friendship and support! You'll never know how much I appreciate all you do for me!
I can tell you that God hears and answers prayers! He sent me angels. I am inspired to live a little better so I can be somebody's angel!

WHO ARE YOUR ANGELS?

3 comments:

Melissa M. said...

Wow, I am so glad you shared that. You made me teary. I am thankful for your angels as well.
I recall you being my angel when I had to go to the hospital, thank you for that.

RocketBox Boy said...

Beautifully written and expressed. Thank you for sharing. I needed an uplifting moment and needed to be reminded that Heavenly Father does send help through others and that with their help we can get through the long list and overwhelming challenges.

Susan said...

You, my friend, are one of mind.